Native Language

A couple of weeks ago, I was talking to my therapist (who will hereafter be referred to as Lillie, as that is her name) about what happens after you learn to speak a new "language".  Specifically, as I embrace being kind to myself, and speaking to myself in a completely different way.  She explained it with this metaphor:

Suppose you, an English speaker, moved to France and began to learn French.  With diligent hard work, eventually, you would become fluent in French.  Perhaps you'd even catch yourself dreaming and thinking in French.  But you'd find that when you were especially stressed, tired, or unhappy, you'd most likely revert back to English.  Your native language.  

So when I forget that being kind to myself doesn't mean looking for answers at the bottom of a pint of Haagen Dazs, it's not that I'm a failure.  It means that I reverted back to my native language: trying to comfort myself by eating too much.  It is the language that I have spoken for as long as I can remember.  

I think this is a beautiful way to re-frame what I would normally take to be proof that I will never be able to change.  Proof that I am a hopeless failure.  Proof that there is something inherently wrong with me.  

Lillie also said that generally, as you speak your new language, reverting back to your native one can happen less and less frequently.  Progress is always possible.  

On a side note, local friends, Lillie (McCatty is her last name) is amazing.  She is astoundingly gifted as a therapist.  She specializes in the treatment of children and adolescents, but I think she handles adults rather well, too.  Or else I'm simply as mature as a teenager.  Either way, she's helping me so much.  :)  

_________________________________________________________

  Yesterday, we went out to lunch with my parents to celebrate Tyler landing a new job.  We went to Mercato, across the street from the Olympia Farmer's Market.  It was so delicious!  Definitely one of my favorite Oly restaurants.  We sat outside in the glorious sun and enjoyed not worrying about financial security.  As Tyler said, "The world is so much more beautiful when you have a job."  :)

Darling Tess 

She's a hard drinker, this one...

I took Olly on a long walk yesterday with my good friend, Tina, too.  Her dog, Chevy, and Olly are best buds.  I forgot to snap a pic of them together, but I'll get one soon.  They love walking together, and playing together in our backyard.  A true doggy bromance. 

Olly and a bit of the gorgeous scenery in my neighborhood

Tyler and Tess were very productive yesterday.  They went and got a bunch of nourishing dirt for our front and back yards (our grass looks so thin and sad!), and then spread it out all over the lawn.  Tyler also bought a bunch of grass seed to add to the mix.  Tess was thrilled to help him spread the seeds:

  

She loves to be a "helper"!

Thanks for reading!